


A Case Study of Arjuno Welirang

by Argal



Series: Arjuno Welirang [2]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Anger, Anxiety, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Hand Jobs, Other, Porn, Self-Hatred, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2020-11-10
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:29:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27495001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Argal/pseuds/Argal
Relationships: Arjuno Welirang/Everyone
Series: Arjuno Welirang [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1968745





	A Case Study of Arjuno Welirang

The room is dark and quiet. It's messy, a rare scene coming from the owner of the place. The man himself laying on the ground, head on the couch, hand holding a TV remote, changing each channel in silent. He look just as messy as his place and how his hair sticked out in many directions shows how the man been brushing it a lot of time──maybe, in frustration.

His name is Weli. Arjuno Welirang.

The channel keep on changing. The man eyes are on the screen, but there's no interest on it. His mind going nowhere, unkown what's been bothering him. He just keep on doing what he's been doing for the past hour. The pace start to get faster, his hand movement now pressed the button of the remote with force. The flat expression on his face slowly change with slight of anger, he frowned. 

The channel keep changing and Weli didn't found anything he can watch. He bites his lips and the next second when he finally feel enough, he throw the remote away, it's breaking when it hit the wall and Weli didn't care. He close his eyes. Hands moving to his face and he wipes his sour expression with his palm. In silent even when anger can be seen clearly around him, he didn't move even inch.

What's wrong with him?

* * *

  
He was on a flight back to Indonesia. He spend his time sleeping on his seat almost the whole time, not really caring about his surrounding. He do at his meal when it's arrived or checking the movie on the screen. The flight feels so long and he feel something weird lingering inside his chest. He might start overthinking again but he should feel joy instead that he finally home right?

It's been awhile since the last time he went back home.

He didn't even went back when it's break of the year because he don't feel like the need to or want to even when his parents ask him to come just anytime he could. Will he able to face his family once again?

Also, with this condition? 

He glance at the window next to him as it seems that they're already in Indonesia. 3 years won't change anything much right? But who knows because even in those 3 years, Weli changed a lot. The time passed, without Weli even know, he's already in Seokarno-Hatta international Airport, dragging his suitcase along with him and the first thing he saw when he get pass the door is his mom and their driver, waving a smile banner of his name.

Mom still looked pretty as always and she might even pass as someone on Weli's age with no doubt. Weli smiles, he wave his hand to her, still walking on slow pace and he open his arms wide for her to hug him.

"Mas Juno, Cah lanangku." She said with touch of happiness on her voice. Weli can't help but feel the warmth spread on his body.

Right. He's here now.

He hug his mother tight before they let go and leaving to their home.

The ride home, his mom keep asking about his life even when they do text a lot or have a quick video call all the time. She can't seems to stop brushing his hair and staring at him who grow up to a really great looking man.

"You work out? You never tell mom about that." She asked while playfully touching Weli's arms or stomach. Weli laughs at the words and hold his mom hand to stop.

"Just sometimes. With friends." He said as answer.

Weli learned on his seat and glance to the window as soon as his mom stopped talking to him to pick up a phone call. He looking out at the road.

He won't run away again.

But he wonder if he gonna be fine when he finally see hia father again? Because unlike his mom, he hardly talk to his father. Even during his Doctoral Graduation, they didn't talk much. It's not like he was a bad father or he's a bad son──or he is?─but they are just not like the old time, they grow further as the time pass.

He glnace at his mom who is talking to his father and telling him that Weli is already here with a smile.

"Weli, talk to your father, hurry!" She said while tugging his clothes and Weli grins awkwardly. But he do what his mother want.

"Hi dad. I'm coming home now." He said quick and a small answer of welcoming is what he heard afterwards.

Weli draw himself as his mom start talkjng with his father because there's barely any conversation between Weli and his father. Weli checked his phone instead, an email coming to his mailbox. After he read the subjects, he close it again.

* * *

  
4 years ago, Weli leave Indonesia to pursue his Doctoral Degree to Japan, or to run from his parents expectation? Weli isn't sure which one is the best answer.

The man though that he might be able to forget everything but he's totally wrong. Because instead of accepting or letting go of it, Weli grow more stressful. His anxiety add up each day and he just grow worse. Far from everything, even from himself.

He know that his Atychiphobia become harder to outcome when he grow up. When he supposed to be healed by having his own time, being alone doesn't seems to help him.

When he keep on thiking about it, without he even know he got another problem he need to face.

Which he doesn't even know it does exist.

  
_𝗪𝗔𝗥𝗡𝗜𝗡𝗚._  
_Mention of sexual content and abuse. Self-hate behavior._

_Skip until the next line if you feel uncomfortable._

  
The sound of two skin against one another can be heard in that dark room. There's only gasps and groans coming right after, no weird background music or anything over happening but Weli doesn't feel the exciment he should be feeling right now. Weli learned on his seat. Eyes doesn't move from the screen. Hand on his thigh, pants unzipped but he didn't touch his length because he doesn't feel like to even after he trying to.

His length still soft, it's so weird because long time ago, it was so easy for him to get hard for a cheesy porn but now, why there's nothing can satisfy him? Even to get him hard, it needs effort.

The screen still show him the sexual scene, a girl being fucked from the back, hands tied and her hair being tugged by the guy as he fuck her hard against the mattress.

𝘈𝘩.. 𝘈𝘩𝘩...

Their moans echoes, it supossed to sounds really sexy, 20 years old Weli will quickly beat his meat on but right now, Weli just sit here face flat and anxiety start growing inside of him.

Was porn always this boring?

He ask himself as he finally move his hand to move the mouse and close the video windows to look for another porn.

𝖡𝗂𝗀 𝗆𝖺𝗌𝗌𝗂𝗏𝖾 𝗍𝗂𝗍𝗌 𝗅𝖺𝖽𝗒 𝗌𝗎𝖼𝗄𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗁𝖾𝗅𝗉𝗅𝖾𝗌𝗌 𝖽𝗎𝖽𝖾.

The description said so and Weli just click it even though it's really sounds so cheesy to him.

The video start with a man tied on the chair. Almost the same chair like what Weli sitting on right now, eyes blindfolded and hands tied to the armchair.

Maybe Weli should start thinking it was him instead of the dude. He shifted on his chair.

The lady was dressed in sexy black See-through lingerie. Weli can see her smooth white smooth skin, her big tits and perky nipples was zoomed.

Weli still doesn't react, he put his palm on his cheek while his other hand start fishing his length.

He should touch himself to feel it. Even when it's still soft or give no reaction, he should work on it. He wrap his fingers around the base, give a firm squeeze as start. His eyes still on the screen to see how things goes.

The lady seat herself between the man legs and teasing his already hard length. He could see that there's cock ring wrapped on his length to hold the man from coming. The lady start to tease him and a moans excape from the man.

Weli still have no reaction over it and he start to move his fingers, giving a long stroke, it always gave him chill all the time but this time he didn't feel it. He start to get pissed.

He put on more lotion to make his work easier, it gets slipperly and his palm getting warm when he move his fingers again.

His eyes still focused on the porn he was watching. Now the lady start to stick out her tongue and give the man a long lick.

The man make more noise, a weak groans, even from his body language he was already on the edge from small simple touch, his head thrown back, mouth agape open, his saliva almost dropped and his toes curls. The lady chuckles and start taking his length further into her mouth, deep throating until his length bugled inside her throat. Her slender fingers also begin to tease his balls.

Weli in the other side grinds his teeth, he feel anxious because his length doesn't give any response even just a small twitch. Weli start moving, long strokes along the whole length, it's still soft, still nothing. Weli look down angrily and he continue to strokes himself as the porn also start building up.

But even until the end of the video, Weli just sit on his seat, back pressed to the back of it, hand sticky not because of his cum, it's because of the lotion and his length is still soft as ever.

Weli close his eyes, bites the inside of his cheek.

Frustrated.

He can't be like this. It's been few times already that he can't get hard. He couldn't get his length to react.

What the fuck happened to him?  
ㅤ  
He turn off his computer, getting up from his seat and clean himself as the clock already strikes almost 3 in the morning and he still have work go do in the morning.

He feel so dissapointed about himself. Feel the shame and bad thoughts hit him, his chest feels heavy and his stomatch doesn't feel good. He start to feel dizzy and wanting to throw up but there's nothing come out.

He walk into the shower. The cold shower hit his heated skin. Weli just stood there for a moment with train of thoughts, he suddenly feel numb all over his body as the realization hit him hard.

Does this mean he suffer impotence?

He bites his cheek again and he now can taste blood on it, he fisted his hand and he punched the glass door of the shower and it's enough to make a crack.

How Weli supposed to overcome this one?

Weli finished his shower after he make more crack all over the glass door. Anyone who walked to that place might wonder what happened but Weli could careless because his mind now is already messy enough.

There's bruises on his hands, bright purple but even the pain coming from it can't help Weli from getting better about his thoughts.

He throw himself on his bed. Burried his face onto the soft mattress, wishing his could just forget, forget everything that he's The Arjuno Welirang Rantelangi. The perfect son of Fajar Surya Rantelangi, who never crack or made mistake, who never know how to fail, who always get what he want.

Maybe if he could be born again. He won't ever choose this cursed path of his life.

He punched the mattress under him once again that night before falling into deep slumber.

* * *

  
The house of Fajar Surya's never really change. It's still the same, even the color and where the things where being put still the same. When Weli walked in, he can feel the familiar atmosphere there. His feet feels heavy to get inside, but his mom drag him in and make the helper to get his stuff to his old room.

"This is your home, son. What are you waiting for?" Weli just grinned and nodded.

He's just thankful that no one is really home when he came.

Weli walked around the house with his mom like it was his first time to be there before going to his room. He get into his room. It's clean like he never leave that place but also cold like no one ever stay there in the first place.

Wall full of his painting, the black sheet of his bed and even the little studio on the corner of his room.

It's still the same.  
The only thing that's not the same is him.

Arjuno Welirang is not the same person anymore.

* * *


End file.
